Winners of the Inaugural Hively Limerick Contest: (Post) Holiday Edition

Oh, such fancy tickled my inbox this holiday season, as limericks rolled in about Krampus and weight loss, reindeer venison and white elephants. Choosing a winner was not particularly simple. But, in the end, it had to be done.

Or, in the case of the winning limerick, it wasn’t going to be done in the end or anywhere else.

With that, I give you the eternally crowned champion of the Inaugural Hively Limerick Contest: (Post) Holiday Edition, by Chompy:

This Christmas Lolita said, “You
should know I’m forbidden to screw.”
So, adjusting his dress,
Santa said, “Well, I guess
the Meccano set isn’t for you.”

Congratulations and endless thanks, Chompy. May success and notoriety serve you dutifully.

Like I said, too many outstanding limericks not to mention some honorables. So, in honor of the extreme weather that everywhere but here has been receiving (neener neener!), I give you more limericky goodness.

Honorable Mention for Suffering Through Poor Subcontracting goes to Missy Mason:

The holidays started with much tribulation!
As the house had no damn insulation!
How could we be merry?
Unless we became very hairy,
Or had a vigorous jubilation?

Honorable Mention for Presumed Fart References goes to Bob Hively:

First came the three feet of snow
Then the wind it began to blow
When it’s below zero
My seat is my hero
It heats me whenever I go.

Thank you and happy post-holidays to all who played along! Be sure to catch the Low-Ku Contest: Pitch Edition, open now through January 24.

(Featured image of a Meccano diesel train copyright Elsie esq. on Flickr via a Creative Commons Attribution Licence.)

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