Until you REALLY master social media, #KeepingTabsOnYourFavoriteCelebrityIsTough. #IGetIt. That’s why you, my dedicated readers, deserve to hear it straight from me, with normal punctuation and spaces: I am a rock star.
Someday soon, you’ll start to hear my greatest hits. I already write this Fool’s Gold thing every week. How much harder could writing one measly culture-defining song be?